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Dana here :) I'm 20 and blog pretty much anything I feel like. Follow me I'll follow you! Not afraid to make friends so don't be afraid to message! :)
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today-ifuckedup
Today, I fucked up… by eating a tin of breathmints
When I was 12 I went on a holiday with my mum to Sydney, which required us to take a short flight from my hometown. Mum gave me a bit of cash to buy myself mints at the airport, so I could suck on them during takeoff (which apparently stops your ears from being blocked off).
I bought my favourite tin of Eclipse Sugarfree Spearmint Flavoured mints, we got on the plane, and with my newfound freedom of having my own box of mints I started to absolutely inhale the things.
I ate the entire container within 15 minutes, and the only initial problem was having seriously minty breath for the first hour of flight. However, about halfway through our travels I desperately needed to fart. This was no big deal, so I lifted myself up slightly and farted… and also shat myself. Turns out that those mint things act as a laxative, especially if you eat too many, so I ended up with a reasonably fucked up amount of diarrhoea all through my undies.
I did react quite quickly though, because I got straight up and went to the bathroom before I caused any real suspicion that I was literally marinading in my own filth. I performed a private (shit covered) strip tease show in the cubicle, threw away my undies, cleaned myself up and went back to my seat as if nothing even happened.
How I got away with it I will never know, but I’m forever thankful that I had the aisle seat and I sincerely apologise to the person who had to deal with the cubicle rubbish bin after we landed.